{"id":103894,"date":"2025-08-14T09:31:31","date_gmt":"2025-08-14T13:31:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.genealogybank.com\/blog\/?p=103894"},"modified":"2025-08-14T09:31:52","modified_gmt":"2025-08-14T13:31:52","slug":"genealogy-tips-interviewing-living-relatives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.genealogybank.com\/blog\/genealogy-tips-interviewing-living-relatives.html","title":{"rendered":"Genealogy Tips: Interviewing Living Relatives"},"content":{"rendered":"

Introduction:<\/em><\/strong> In this article, Katie Rebecca Merkley gives tips for interviewing relatives, and emphasizes the importance of doing this soon while they\u2019re still with us \u2013 especially the older relatives. Katie specializes in U.S. research for family history, enjoys writing and researching, and is developing curricula for teaching children genealogy. She has a website: krgarnergenealogy.com<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

Each person has a story worth remembering. However, not everyone is good at keeping a journal or diary. Not everyone is featured in local newspapers \u2013 and even then, a newspaper article about a relative won\u2019t cover the whole life story.<\/p>\n

One way to make sure our relatives are remembered is to interview them and record the stories they tell.<\/p>\n

\"Photo:
Photo: interviewing an older male relative.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Photo credit: https:\/\/depositphotos.com\/home.html<\/a><\/p>\n

The Sooner the Better<\/strong><\/p>\n

Some people who get into genealogy later in life regret not doing it sooner, when their older relatives were still alive.<\/p>\n

I grew up knowing my paternal great-grandparents and was a young adult when they passed.<\/p>\n

When I was a teenager who enjoyed reading romance books, I asked my great-grandpa how he and great-grandma met. He told me about the college recreation center where he and great-grandma met while playing ping pong; how they wrote letters when she had to work instead of going to school; and how they married right out of college.<\/p>\n

Had I not asked great-grandpa that, or waited too long, I either would have never heard that story or heard it secondhand. Now that he\u2019s gone, I can only get stories of him from other relatives.<\/p>\n

My maternal grandmother is currently in a nursing home with dementia. Even though she has lived longer than her doctor predicted, she is usually not in a mental state to tell stories about her life or her relatives. The time for that has passed. I once tried to call her to ask about her father in WWII, and she didn\u2019t seem to know how to talk on the phone that day.<\/p>\n

If you have aging relatives, interview them before it\u2019s too late. Call them up as soon as you finish reading this article. (Or call them now if you don\u2019t need my tips and tricks.)<\/p>\n

Coming up with Questions<\/strong><\/p>\n

When preparing for an interview, it\u2019s a good idea to come up with a list of questions. Decide what you want to learn about, and focus the questions on that. Do not make the list too long.<\/p>\n

For example, my great-aunt worked for Martin Luther King Jr. in college, which influenced her career choices after graduation. I interviewed her about that for one of my college projects.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t worry if the conversation veers off topic. As memories are sparked in your relative, they\u2019ll keep talking. You may get some unexpected, interesting stories. In a conversation with my grandmother, she started talking about her engagement to her first husband. They married in the 1950s when she was 19 and he was 30.<\/p>\n

My grandmother told me how my grandfather showed little to no interest in connecting with her before they married, yet he got mad when she suggested breaking the engagement. I wondered why he was so insistent on marrying someone he didn\u2019t wish to connect with, then I remembered what I\u2019d learned about the 1950s in my history class. A single man aged 30 back then would have been desperate to marry. I don\u2019t remember what sparked that conversation, but I don\u2019t think it was a formal interview.<\/p>\n

You may wish to interview a relative about another relative, usually someone whom you have never met but whom they knew. I once interviewed my great-aunt about her grandmother \u2013 my great-great-grandmother. In this case, you\u2019ll want to come up with questions about the other relative and the interviewee\u2019s memories of them. When I asked my great-aunt what she remembered about her grandmother, she told me about her mashed potatoes<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Interviewing Remotely vs. Face to Face<\/strong><\/p>\n

If the relative you wish to interview is local, you have the option to interview in person. One advantage of this is that you\u2019re the only one who is messing with technology. Another benefit is that you can do it in the relative\u2019s home, where they can be the most comfortable. This is optimal for getting them to open up about their life story to you.<\/p>\n

This year is the 50th anniversary of my church congregation. The bishop wanted me to prepare a history presentation about the congregation. In my investigations, I was able to identify some members in the congregation who\u2019d been there since its early days. I went to their houses to interview them. We sat on couches or armchairs, and I took notes on my laptop. I learned how my current neighborhood evolved over the past half century and about the different customs in the 1970s. The people I interviewed enjoyed sharing their memories.<\/p>\n

You don\u2019t always have the option to interview in person. My great-aunt lives in another state, so I\u2019ve had to interview her over the phone. Various software options offer the ability to have interviews via video call. Many families, including my own, keep in contact via video calls. A video call, as opposed to a phone call, allows you and the interviewee to see each other\u2019s faces.<\/p>\n

The downside to a video call is that older relatives are not usually tech-savvy and might struggle to get the video call going. If your family is accustomed to video calls, use the software they\u2019re familiar with. This way, your relative doesn\u2019t have to struggle with something new. If your relative is not accustomed to video calls, choose a user-friendly app and walk them through it. Try not to let the technology create a frustrating situation.<\/p>\n

If your relative struggles with video call software, consider settling for a phone call instead.<\/p>\n

Recording or Taking Notes<\/strong><\/p>\n

Recording or taking notes of an interview allows the information learned to be preserved for posterity. One way to record an interview is with old-fashioned handwritten shorthand notes. Those not tech-savvy might prefer that method. There is also a myriad of technologies to aid in this process.<\/p>\n

For my phone interviews in college, I typed notes using Microsoft Word. I still did that when interviewing my great-aunt in recent projects, but I am more systematic about it now.<\/p>\n

When interviewing fellow church members, I recorded the conversations on my phone. I sought out recording apps that also transcribe. (I do not enjoy transcribing manually.) Most of the apps I found cost money but had a free trial period.<\/p>\n

Most video call apps have an option to record calls. Some of them also have AI transcription features. If you are conducting a phone interview, you may wish to first download a call recording app.<\/p>\n

Now that you\u2019ve learned some tips and tricks on interviewing living relatives, give them a call and schedule some interviews. Record their stories before it\u2019s too late!<\/p>\n

Explore your family history by creating your free account<\/a> at GenealogyBank for 7 days, because every life deserves to be remembered, recorded, and rediscovered.<\/p>\n

Note on the header image:<\/em><\/strong> interviewing an older female relative. Credit: https:\/\/depositphotos.com\/home.html<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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