{"id":60311,"date":"2020-07-24T11:19:25","date_gmt":"2020-07-24T15:19:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.genealogybank.com\/?p=60311"},"modified":"2023-10-26T14:11:36","modified_gmt":"2023-10-26T18:11:36","slug":"was-great-grandma-a-grass-widow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.genealogybank.com\/blog\/was-great-grandma-a-grass-widow.html","title":{"rendered":"Was Great-Grandma a Grass Widow?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Introduction:<\/em><\/strong> In this article, Gena Philibert-Ortega explains what a \u201cgrass widow\u201d is \u2013 a term genealogists run across in their research. <\/em>Gena is a genealogist and author of the book \u201c<\/em>From the Family Kitchen<\/em>.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Were any of your female ancestors a widow during their lifetime? Considering a female ancestor\u2019s life as a widow is important because widowhood results in records, including military or work pensions, based on their husband\u2019s service. But historically, the term \u201cwidow\u201d does not just refer to women whose husbands have died.<\/p>\n

Who Is a Widow?<\/strong><\/p>\n

A widow is someone whose husband is deceased. That\u2019s probably obvious to you. But what is a \u201cgrass widow\u201d? While some people may be familiar with its 19th century American meaning, the term can be found in Europe much earlier: the phrase grass widow has been around since the 16th century.<\/p>\n

If you come across the term grass widow for a 19th<\/sup> or 20th<\/sup> century female ancestor in the United States of America, it refers to a woman who is temporarily separated from her husband. This separation may be related to work, military service, or (around 1849) it was due to the California Gold Rush. Women whose husbands left to find their fortune, even if it was temporary, might also have been referred to as a grass widow or a \u201cCalifornia widow.\u201d<\/p>\n

Historically, many women have lived apart from their husbands for long periods of time because of immigration, military service, war, or an occupation like whaling, that required lengthy travels. In addition, some women found themselves separated from their husbands due to his abandonment of the family. Similar to a death, the grass widow\u2019s husband\u2019s absence may be documented in records such as the census, occupational records, and the newspaper.<\/p>\n

So how old is this term grass widow? It\u2019s believed to go back to at least the 16th century in England and referred to a woman with a child who did not have a husband, nor had a husband when the child was conceived. Similarly, a word meaning \u201cstraw bride\u201d has been found in a German document from the 1300s. This word referred to women who lived with a man before marriage. (1) According to Merriam-Webster, a grass widow can also mean a discarded mistress (first used in 1528), or a woman who is divorced or separated. (2)<\/p>\n

In old newspapers can be found references to the term \u201cgrass\u201d coming from the French and meaning \u201cgrace\u201d \u2013 meaning she is a \u201ccourtesy widow.\u201d However, according to Oxford University Press, this is incorrect. (3)<\/p>\n

So why the use of the word \u201cgrass\u201d? Scholars have debated that origin and you can learn more about it in the Oxford University Press blog post Grass Widows and Straw Men<\/a>. One idea behind the use of the word \u201cgrass\u201d is that it refers to where one would lie down to take part in indiscretions. It also may refer to the straw wreath young German women were forced to wear at their wedding which served as a visual reminder of their indiscretion. (4)<\/p>\n

Grass Widows in the Newspaper<\/strong><\/p>\n

It\u2019s not unusual to see the term grass widow in old newspapers, such as GenealogyBank\u2019s Historical Newspaper Archives<\/a> \u2013 and as time goes on, historical newspapers refer to divorcees as grass widows in very unkind terms. This 1922 illustrated newspaper article suggests that grass widows should wear a ring to signify their divorce, differing from the one they wore as wives.<\/p>\n

\"An<\/a>
Montgomery Advertiser (Montgomery, Alabama), 2 April 1922, page 4<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Although you\u2019re unlikely to find someone today casually refer to a woman as a grass widow in print, you can find these references in newspapers into the late 20th century. This 1970 celebrity gossip column refers to a woman not by name \u2013 but as a grass widow.<\/p>\n

\"An<\/a>
Arkansas Gazette (Little Rock, Arkansas), 29 December 1970, page 18<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Today\u2019s football widows were yesterday\u2019s golf grass widows. While language changes over time, it\u2019s interesting that the idea of men focusing on other pursuits, thus causing them to be either physically or emotionally absent, still causes women to be referred to as \u201cwidows.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"An<\/a>
Daily Advocate (Stamford, Connecticut), 16 December 1969, page 27<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Who Was the Grass Widow in Your Family Tree?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Is it important to know that great-grandma was a grass widow? Yes \u2013 knowing about a husband\u2019s absence can lead to additional records or provide you with clues to explore her life. One of my paternal great-grandmothers was a grass widow while her husband was serving in the U.S. Navy in the 1920s. One of those years, she is the one listed in their hometown city directory with her occupation, something that would not be listed if he had been at home.<\/p>\n

As you explore possible records created because of her husband\u2019s absence, whether intentional or due to death, consider the time period and what the absence of a husband (and possibly his income) could mean to a family. Did she work during this time? Did she move in with family who could support her?<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t forget that anytime you see someone referred to as a widow, you need to \u201ckill off\u201d her spouse before taking it as a fact, meaning you need to verify the information with proof of his death found in documents such as a death certificate, a pension, or an obituary.<\/p>\n

________________<\/p>\n

(1) \u201cGrass Widows and Straw Men,\u201d Oxford University Press Blog (https:\/\/blog.oup.com\/2009\/02\/grasswidows\/<\/a>: accessed 18 July 2019).
\n(2) \u201cGrass Widow,\u201d Merriam-Webster (https:\/\/www.merriam-webster.com\/dictionary\/grass%20widow<\/a>: accessed 18 July 2019).
\n(3) \u201cGrass Widows and Straw Men,\u201d Oxford University Press Blog (https:\/\/blog.oup.com\/2009\/02\/grasswidows\/<\/a>: accessed 18 July 2019).
\n(4) Ibid.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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